Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Baby Safe Haven Hotline

Woman finds newborn left on sand at Hawaii beach

"HONOLULU (AP) — A baby girl was abandoned and found crying in the sand at a Hawaii beach soon after she was born, human services officials said Monday.
The full-term, 8-pound newborn was "abandoned immediately after birth," state Department of Human Services Director Patricia McManaman said.
A woman parked at Sandy Beach in east Honolulu sometime between 11 p.m. Sunday and midnight heard several people screaming, police spokeswoman Michelle Yu said. A few minutes later the screaming stopped and the woman heard a baby crying.
She walked toward the ocean and saw an infant on the sand. The woman took the baby to a hospital. Police are investigating the case as endangering the welfare of a minor and child abandonment.
The baby, who had been found naked, was doing well and drinking formula at the Queen's Medical Center, McManaman said. "We're just very grateful this child is alive and doing well," she said.
If no one comes forward to claim the child, the Department of Human Services will file a petition this week with family court, asking for custody. A hearing will be held by Monday. If no family is identified, the state will ask the court for permission to release a photo of the infant on Monday, McManaman said.
In 2007, Hawaii became the 48th state with a baby safe haven law, said state Rep. John Mizuno. The law provides immunity from prosecution for leaving an unharmed newborn within 72 hours of birth at a fire department, police station or hospital or with emergency services.
No one has taken advantage of the law since it was enacted, McManaman said. The baby safe haven hotline is 800-494-3991."



Mrs. C

Friday, April 26, 2013

Not Sure

There are very little times in my life when my fingers do not feel like typing. That is how my little ink-free limbs feel today, but I force them on knowing it helps to get it all out. I am really struggling lately with the grief part of infertility. I feel stuck and I hate it. I cry out to my Father to release me from this want. Lately I think it is gone but it re-visits me so suddenly. I truly know that a baby/child will not make me a happier, fulfilled, etc...but yet my heart yearns to care for a child. And yes people, I know care means many many poopie diapers, sleepless years, worry, etc. You would think us infertile myrtles would take it as a blessing right? Can't I just snap out of it, sign up for a mission trip, and go care for a child somewhere? Is that what I am supposed to do? I think I am grieving the life I dreamt of since I was so little. I never dreamed up an elaborate wedding; I dreamed of being loved and sharing that love with our children.

I heard a message this morning. Keep in mind that I am very skeptical and weary on any message I hear lately. I question motives, truth, character, etc... Any by the way, I am not saying I know it all; in fact, I am saying the opposite: I know nada. This particular message enveloped prayer.  Why does God say no? Why does it feel like He doesn't answer sometimes? To summarize, the speaker said that maybe it is because we are living in sin, or maybe we are not praying the will of God. I heard a message the other day. To summarize, the speaker spoke about how we shouldn't stop knocking. That we should keep asking God. UGH...am I totally cut off from the holy spirit lately..it sure feels that way. Where is that soft whisper that directs my heart during these human fed messages? I miss it Lord. I keep hearing to seek the truth, which I believe is the living word. Does that mean I should memorize it all, sign up for Another bible study, devotion the heck out of every morning? Why do my devotions feel like BLAH lately anyways? God is obviously doing some work in me right now that I can not even organize on paper.

Not sure if this was a thought, prayer, or view but good luck getting all this.

Looking 2 HIM for help,
Mrs. C

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Another year older

Tis' a strange thing to grow older with infertility. Just last night Kyle and I were in awe that one of our friends kids was turning 6 already. For me, that means we have been ttc for at least 5 years now (to be honest I have kind of lost track how long). Weird to watch your friends children grow up and go through baby stage, to toddler stage, and then before we know it we are attending tee ball and bumblebee soccer games.  Weird to watch your younger cousins have their first babies. Weird to be the dog lady.

I met with two of my dear friends this morning. They are dear to me in so many ways and I was so touched that they would pack up all their gear, sick babies, strollers, bottles, etc...and travel just to sit and have coffee with me and my puppy. I was reminded that God had truly blessed me with these amazing women who still make a HUGE effort to talk about how cute Maddie is when all the passer-byers are looking at their babies. Thank YOU Father for these women. Thank YOU Lord for these friendships. What a beautiful gift to have selfless friends who go out of their way to include their barren friend. I love you gals and hope that I too can follow your model and put you before myself.

Monday, April 1, 2013


It's tiring being angry; especially when you are angry at God. I havent wanted to talk about it or think about it. I have filled my time with things that please me temporarily all the while blaming God. I shudder a little thinking about how long I have held onto the - " I don't have a baby" anger. I am relieved to say that I have finally let it go. I got down on my knees and thanked Him for understanding my human heart and the anger that had lingered there. Following, I asked for forgiveness and then thanked Him for the sweet forgiveness that comes so generously and abundantly. And now that the anger is gone, I will be making some changes. More to come...